Sunday, June 01, 2008

No Jury Duty for me...

Nope, I'm getting out of it. Says my Doctor very emphatically.

But not the way I wanted to. I'm going to be otherwise occupied in an OR Suite, maybe I'll have a cute anesthesiologist! :) I need to have another biopsy done as I have DCIS. They now need to also check my lymph nodes and decide on the right treatment for me. Either way it's a tough decision on what to do. I mean, yeah I was planning on a tummy tuck and reduction one day, but not like this...

But then not everything goes to plan. The best thing is this is totally curable. I'll know more after my appointment on Monday. I'm really doing ok, for right now....

But how...how do you tell your son the day after his graduation, that you are having surgery. The time of his life when he should be enjoying his and his friends graduations, his mom is sick. I don't want him to remember this time like that. I am more scared to tell the kids then I am to have any surgery. My daughter is going to be a wreck. Yes, folks I am telling you before them. I know I have great, tough kids, but it's just hard.

They were so great when we told them about hubby. So that's mainly why I'm waiting until after the appointment so I can give them more facts and information as I have a few questions too. I feel bad for Hubby, as he's out of town for a few weeks and is very frustrated he can't be here. But he'll be here for the "big" surgery and I do have my in-laws here and they'll help me out a lot. I'm usually the one helping them so it is weird in that aspect. Yes, I am no good in asking for help. Kinda stubborn that way, and so much like my mother.

My mother, sadly didn't know all the things I know....she didn't get the chance to find it early, but I did. My mom's brother's wife just had a mastectomy last week, and I'm really close with them....but I just can't bring myself to telling them yet.

Well, my friends, sorry to start your week on a bummer note. But thank you so much for letting me share. The best thing you can do for me is just be here for me. I promise not to turn this into a cancer blog, there will be much knitting (sadly not tops or sweaters for a while yet) and pr0n! Now off to knit a bit before bed. :)

43 comments:

Trillian42 said...

Oh, sweetie. Not the news we were hoping for at all. Take care of yourself, and please, PLEASE do not hesitate to ask for ANYTHING. If I can do it, you know I will.

Sarah Jackson said...

Oh goodness. Big big hugs, my friend. This has to be so tough for you. Know that I'm sending lots of love and strength your way. And if you need some desert recuperation, you know where to come.

tiennie said...

I wish you all the best.

Pooch said...

Bless you and your medical team. You are so thoughtful and considerate of the people in your life and their feelings. I hope they'll be a source of comfort and strength for you.

:)

gilraen said...

Zonda you vent whatever you need to vent. I/We will listen. {{{Hugs}}} and lots of best wishes/thoughts and prayers are going your way at the moment. I wish you good luck with the surgery and telling your kids. forget the meme, in the grand scheme it isn't at all important.........

Love Margaret

IrishgirlieKnits said...

Oh Zonda. ((((hugs)))) I'm so sorry its not the news you or any of us were hoping for but I am praying that all will continue to be well for you. Please let me know if there is absolutely anything I can do!! No sweaters for awhile...that's okay, I guess you just may need some new pretty sock yarn! Know that we are all here for you. Take care this week!

vickyd said...

I'm so sorry to hear about this, Zonda. Please know that you are in my thoughts...Good luck with your upcoming surgery.

Bezzie said...

Dude, am I the only one that's not depressed about this? You're catching it early, and according to that website you linked it's really not the end of the world. Screw the "sorry to hear that" talk--rock on chickie, you're a leg up on this shit.

But yes, telling the kiddies will suck. But hey, look on the bright side, they will appreciate hearing it from you as opposed to getting an email from you. ;-)

turtlegirl76 said...

I'm with Bezzie. It sounds like as far as bad news goes, it's the best possible scenario. You've been smart about taking care of yourself and got yourself to the Doctor in plenty of time to catch this nice and early. You're going to be just fine. And you know I'm always here if you need me. It's not that far a drive.

thegabbyknitter said...

I'm so sorry to hear that you have to go through all of this but thank god they caught it early and that your going to be ok. Big hugs to you. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Virtuous said...

I was feeling sad at first after I read your entry as this is the 1st time I am hearing about this, but I am echoing Bezzie too!

So glad you are getting ready to beat this!! YAH! :o)

My prayers are with you in having strength to tell the kids and that they will have it too during your surgery and recovery to wellness!!

Poops said...

Hey, if you have to have the cancer, I guess this is the kind to get. Hearing that this one is operable and completely treatable--and can be completely removed!--is great news to me.

Okay, better not to need surgery at all, but I'm so relieved that it wasn't so much worse.

My prayers are with you. And keep us updated!

Sara said...

Oh goodness. Not the update anyone was hoping for I know. You're in my thoughts - frequently.

Disco said...

Things to be thankful for: you got it early and; it's curable.

The kids will be fine, remind them of the things to be thankful for.

Good luck with your surgery - I'll be praying for you ;0)

Julie said...

Oh Zonda, you know we are all here for you. I'm sorry it wasn't better news, but you I am so glad to hear that it is completely curable and you found it early. I'll definitely be sending lots of good thoughts your way! Take care of yourself.

{{{hugs}}}

sgeddes said...

What a crappy way to get out of jury duty! It sure won't be any fuin at all and I'm here thinking all my good thoughts for you.

I am glad that this is curable and that it sounds liek you are on top of it! Think good thoughts and please let me know what I can do to help.

Javajem said...

Oh Z - I'm so sorry to hear this. I will be praying for you! You're strong and I know everything will be ok.

Lots of love!

Karen said...

I'm with everyone else - my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Hugs,
Karen

Kim U said...

Sending you and your family lots of good thoughts.

Carol said...

Don't feel bad about the whole "ruining graduation" part. Quite frankly, at my graduation, all of us grads were bored out of our minds. The ceremony is for the parents and family. As far as we were concerned, we'd already finished when the last exam was written.
Get all the information you can and then just grit your teeth and do what needs to be done. One step at a time. That's how you learned to knnit and sew, right? Just one stitch more....

One of my favorite quotes is from Lois Mcmaster-Bujold,"Tests are a gift. The greater the test, the greater the gift. what are you going to do with you gift?"

I'm pulling for ya! Chin up and all that.

Chris said...

*hug* Definitely here for you. Take very good care!

Donna said...

OMG! I did not expect to come here today and see this. Sending big hugs to you and lots of warm wishes, prayers, good thoughts, the whole nine yards.

kasiaiscarly said...

sending lots of good thoughts your way! on the bright side, if you've gotta deal with cancer, that's a good one to have since it's non-invasive!

KnelleyBelley said...

Delurking to say that I'll be thinking good thoughts for you. I've been through the BC thing myself and came out on the other side in great shape. Your doctors are going to fix you up! It's so scary to tell your children because we moms don't want to cause one minute of worry for our kids, but they'll handle it. This experience will bring you all even closer together.

Now go kick butt!

kemtee said...

1. Caught early.
2. Excellent success rate with surgery.
3. You're in good doctor hands.

1+2+3=Z+ :-)

Your kids are smart, strong, and definitely mature enough to deal with the facts. And you're smart, strong, and mom enough to give it to 'em.

Holler if you need anything. I'm only a few clicks away.

The Kelly Green Rogue said...

*hugs* you're in my thoughts

Macoco said...

I'm so glad that this was caught early! I'll definitely keep you in my thoughts for the upcoming surgery.

choomon said...

Zonda-
You're in my thoughts.*smooch*

peaknits said...

You are in my prayers - please take care - and you deserve some extra special prOn:)

roxy =^o^= said...

Big hugs and lots of love and prayers being stockpiled for you sweetheart. We'll be waiting with Koigu and recovery chocolate with your name all over it :)

xo
rox

funfairiegirl said...

*hugs*

Sonya said...

Thank goodness it's been caught early! You'll be in my prayers as you prepare for your surgery.

Jennifer said...

Oh Zonda. I'm sending you hugs and healthy energy.

nanaknits said...

I'm with everyone else, not the news we hoped for, And I don't have anymore wise thing to add. Just plenty of hugs and caring and prayers are headed your way.

Karen said...

Okay, I finally broke down and paid the $9.95 the hotel charges for a day of internet access because I couldn't stand not knowing what your test results were. I'm sorry they weren't as good as I was hoping - but I'm also glad to hear they aren't as bad as they could have been. I wish I lived closer so I could help you with anything and everything you need - but please do let me know what I can do to help you from afar. And in the mean time, I'm sending you big hugs and lots of love.

Rebecca said...

surgery, oh no? i hope everything goes well. you'll be in my thoughts.

Heather said...

Well, I'll just stick to my glass is half full mentality and give you a big "it could be worse." Honestly though, this really sucks and must be very scary to you and your family. But you are right, it's treatable,and you should feel great that you caught it early. I can't even imagine the number of women (me) that don't get their physicals when they should. I'm sure your family will surprise you with their strength and you really should not shoulder this burden alone. My thoughts are with you! :)

aquaknits said...

I'm so sorry for this news, but I know your wonderful family will help you get through these tough times. Of course, anything any of us can do for you just name it.

Sending all the support and warm thoughts in the world your way.

Jess said...

I am with bezzie and the gang.
You can do this. And you can tell the kiddos and they will be fine. You are a strong chick. A beautiful, educated, tough chick to boot. Keep positive.
No matter what, you have my prayers. I hope you will keep us readers all updated.

Kay aka dkswife said...

Darnit! It sounds likes it is very treatable though, which is awesome. You are still in my prayers.

((hugs))

Kay

DPUTiger said...

(Yes, I'm way behind on blog reading, but better late than never!) Oh boy ... Not the best news, but you know you have tons of happy thoughts coming your way and this sounds like the best-case scenario of bad news. We'll all be here for you and it's gonna turn out well in the end! :) (((HUG)))

Andi said...

I wish you strength. I have you in my prayers.
My sister in law was diagnosed a little over a year ago with DCIS. She had a mastectomy and reconstruction and is doing very well right now - even with a five yr old and a two yr old to contend with.

weezalana said...

(((((HUGS))))) I'm sorry it's not the news you were hoping for, but happy you caught it early! It sounds like it's fully treatable, and for that we are all grateful!